Ground: St James Park, Exeter
Competition: League Two 2014/15
Result: Exeter 1-1 Portsmouth
Pie: Steak and Ale & Steak Pasty
Price: £2.50
Comments: Horray! The season has begun! It’s that joyous time of the year when all are hopeful little infantile dreamers living in the impossible belief that this will be our season. For Fulham it really couldn’t get any worse than last year’s 38 game horror show, in fact it’s already been an massive improvement as John Arne Riise, along with his massive arse, wonky left leg and dead crow on his head, have been turfed out of the hallowed pitch at Craven Cottage.

Yet rather than venturing to Ipswich to see Fulham embark on their promotion push I found myself going to see football league giants Exeter City as part of my lads holiday. This is what happens when you fail to book a real holiday, take note kids.

Nevertheless, this was an excellent opportunity to sample a new pie from a new ground I’m unlikely to ever visit again, unless Fulham go completely tits up and do a Portsmouth. With Baltis off the menu as some fat bastard had gobbled five up for himself, it was back to good ol’ steak and ale. Adopting the usually less enjoyable rectangular shape the pressure mounted early on the pie’s crunchy topping, luckily once inside the pie provided a moist, juicy filling probably, but by no means certainly, beef. On the downside the pie had probably been a bit frazzled in the oven heater, meaning the pastry itself erred on the dry side, when will clubs learn?

While by no means a vintage pie it was a considerable improvement on the brick disguised as a pasty that my poor friend Sam suffered. Drier than Thomas Gravesen’s cranium, this pasty, from near the Cornish mecca, was one to be avoided at all costs.

So a new pie to start the season, solid without ever threatening to dazzle. At least that’s better than Fulham- different league, different team, same shit result. Derby next on the pie agenda.

Rating: 7/10 (Steak & Ale)
2/10 (Pasty)